Thursday, May 30, 2013

on letting go...

Day 30, Thursday: React to this term: Letting Go

i feel like i've talked about letting go a couple different times on this blog. probably because letting go is what i had to do. the choice i had to make. and not an easy choice it was. but in hindsight, the best choice i could ever make for myself.

to me letting go takes strength. when some say you gave up or you should have tried harder, i see the strength behind those very hard days, nights, months of trying to decide to let go or hold on. and i commend those that hold on. that fight for their lives. it takes just as much strength but a different kind. l

letting go takes the strength to see that some things may never change. that you deserve better. that some people are toxic in your life. and that you have to fight for yourself. for you well being. for your happiness.

i have a friend that i have known since i was a child and i am currently finding myself in the position of needing to let her go. its a hard thing. one moment i completely grasp that she is toxic in my life and the next, i am dwelling on the history and the good times. but eventually, after so many years of ups and downs and being treated much less than you deserve; after so much energy and thought put into how to be better, how to make it better, how to be less frustrated and be more available, you have to realize its not all you. you have tried and fought and some people come into our lives for a reason or season. and that's all. and then you have to let go. because its just not good for you anymore.

letting go is sometimes about putting ourselves first. i am a person who is constantly concerned about what everyone else needs, what they feel, are the bummed? mad? disappointed? frustrated with me? how i can help them? how do i make it better for them? and i do this at the cost of myself. a lot.

letting go is sometimes simply just that. letting go of the things holding us back and having the strength to do so. whether that means moving on and away from a situation or moving on from the things that are upsetting us and being willing to move forward within the situation.

its such a simple term and yet holds so so much meaning.

1 comment:

Nicole @ Haute Runner said...

I had to deal with a similar situation my last year of high school. I (and they) thought the problem was me but I soon realized that I was better off without them. I shouldn't change myself to be friends with these people- they should accept me for who I am. Yes, I am not perfect but I shouldn't have to completely change who I am in order to remain friends with them.

Best decision ever although at the time it was very tough and I had second thoughts for awhile.