Monday, December 31, 2012

A Cliche (but I totally don't care) 2012 Recap Post

I have been a completely horrible blogger in 2012 but as the year comes to a close and I resolve to be a better blogger in 2013, I thought I'd end the bad blogger year which a recap post. 2012 was a year of high highs and very low lows. I'll be honest, I'd settle for a totally calm and mediocre 2013 after the past 12 months.

2012 started with not really knowing where the year was going to go after all I had been through at the end of 2011. I resolved to take it one day at a time and then those days started going faster than I could keep up with it seemed. I filed for divorce, took a family trip to Arizona to visit my grandma, and at the end of February, joined Match when I realized I didn't know how to date after the past 7 years.

Shortly after joining Match, I met this guy... (ignore the old blog name watermark)

Right before we met, I agreed to help out at a film festival where my family was really involved and I threw myself into that working my own schedule but often 7 days a week. It was whirlwind, especially when the 8 day event came and I have never been so tired in my life. haha.

The first 4 months of dating seemed to be on super speed and then we moved in together at the end of June.

My grandma had had a couple heart attacks in March and then at the end of July, I rushed her back to the hospital where we spent a few days. She went home for a week and then was back. She is now living with my parents and celebrated what we expect to be her last Christmas this year. We are struggling with it but just taking one day at a time at this point. She has surprised us before but we aren't getting our hopes up either. 

The same weekend I rushed her to the hospital, M and I were scheduled to pick up the puppy we adopted on a fluke the week before. 

She is our most favorite girl. Also the most rambunctious  She has energy for days...


Sometime in the summer, I decided Mike and I should make a 101 in 1001 list and its been fun to casually check things off the list. 

As fall approached, I started looking for a new job as I needed to find something with benefits and a little more dough to keep things going. I interviewed with a company I worked for in Northern California and it was going well. The day I was offered the job, Mike lost his. The past 3 months have been difficult to say the least. (more on this in the new year)

The day I started my new job was also the day the divorce was final and we went out to celebrate with my family. A huge weight off my shoulders.

I had been planning a Mustache Bash to celebrate Mike's 30th and although things were rough, we decided to go ahead with the party and were so glad we did. It was a ton of fun. {top on my list of things to blog about in 2013...the details were adorable and I want to share!}

My birthday came next and we celebrated by going to Disneyland together for the first time although we both grew up going with our families all the time. 

The shop has been growing this year and I have big (big) plans for revamping the shop in 2013. Still in the works... stay tuned!


We closed out the year with a wonderful first Christmas together where M got his first fancy enamel pan for cooking (he loves to cook) (he rubs it every now and then, he loves it so much) and I was a lucky girl receiving a brand new lens for my camera and growing hobby-hope-to-turn-business. Oh and I may have tortured my dog while I was at it....

M is still trying to figure out that whole job thing possibly following a dream he has had for awhile. Scary but exciting. 

We hope 2013 will treat us a little better than 2012 did and will find us a little less stressed... our health demands it at this point.

We wish you a happy last day of 2012 and a very happy new year!


Monday, December 24, 2012

Merry Christmas from our little family to yours.

Photobucket


Merry Christmas friends! 
May your holiday be filled with laughter and joy and all the love in your hearts. 

Monday, December 3, 2012

Book of Lists | List 1: Wishlist

I decided to participate in the Book of Lists being hosted by a friend of a friend over at Kapachino but never got around to posting my cover last month.

This months list prompt is "wishlist".

For my list I decided to go with the bigger dreams or wishes instead of my current not-so-important desires.


Read about the original idea here.
And this months Kapachino list here.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving... and Black Friday!



Its time! Only 33 shopping days until Christmas and Corner With Love is having a Black Friday sale! But not just Friday! Black Friday through Cyber Monday!


So grab a ruffle-y fun camera strap for those photography lovers on your list or grab one for you! Send your husbands, moms, friends with a hint on your favorite fabrics. This is the weekend to do so!

Happy Turkey Day and Happy Christmas Shopping!!!

p.s. this includes custom orders! send me an email and i will work as quick as possible to get your custom listings posted!

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Its Sale Time!


Its the 11th month. And in order to get ahead of the holiday rush this year, I'm offering a month long sale. 

Been waiting to buy that cute ruffly camera strap? Thinking about getting one for the photographer lover in your life? Nows the time!

ruffles, no ruffles.
mix and match.
lens cap pockets.
custom sizes. 

it all can be done! 

i can't wait to work with you!!!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Saturday, October 27, 2012

balance.

i can't seem to find the balance.

it was been a month since i last blogged.
i quickly throw strap orders together at night between dinner and a shower.
i look at my computer maybe twice during the week.
my personal to do list doesn't get touched.
i haven't read a book in who knows how long. i used to read 40 or 50 in a year.
i barely touch my camera, my favorite thing in my house. (thing... as in, non-breathing)
when i do, the pictures sit untouched, unedited.

it is so frustrating.

i get up at 5:30am. i throw on makeup, scarf down some breakfast while M makes my lunch, and get out the door by 6:20am. work all day and get home around 4:30pm.

i had big plans to take advantage of the early schedule. the off at 4pm thing. it seems ideal. and in some ways it is. but after spending 8 hours working with 5 and 6 year olds, the majority of it on my feet, and a couple hours outside, i just want to sit when i get home.

and before i know it, M has dinner on the table, our shows are on and suddenly its 9pm and i need to get a shower so i can sleep in the morning. sometimes i don't know how i got from monday to thursday without accomplishing anything other than a coloring sheet and a few conflict negotiations*.

and i hate it. i want to find the balance. i want to pursue the big ideas i have for my little handmade company. i want to edit the pumpkin patch pictures and the mustache bash pictures. i want to post them on my little blog, my scrapbook of life. i want to read your blogs and participate in the community i love. i want to bake cookies. i want to read a book.

i need those things. i need to not get lost in the crayons and anecdotal notes. i need to not lose sense of me and the things i love.

but i can't find the balance. i can't get in the routine i need and want.

hopefully i will find a way to figure it out sometime soon...

*there is a lot more to my job. i am completely simplifying it and making it sound like a glorified babysitter and that's not what it is. swear it.

Monday, October 1, 2012

official

today is a big day.

some may think i should be hiding in a corner crying my eyes out. or in a deep contemplative state wondering how life got to be the way it is. or wanting to be a recluse and not see or talk to anyone.

but i'm not.

instead i am breathing the biggest sigh of relief i probably ever have.

on november 4th, 2011, i completed a long, rough 8 hour drive by myself. and when i walked in the door of the home i grew up in with a suitcase and tired eyes, i breathed a sigh of relief.

but today. today it is all done. it is finalized and official and i no longer have to sit in this limbo land waiting for all ties to be cut. the sigh of relief is even bigger today.

today one of the many weights sitting on my shoulders is being lifted. possibly the biggest weight of them all.

today i am officially divorced. today i am officially freed of the emotional abuse that i endured for 7 years. today i can take a new step forward without the one little tie still hanging on by a thread.



11 months, hours of phone calls, hundreds of dollars, and countless tears later, it is done.

today i am happy. i am relieved. i am content.

today the healing takes a giant leap forward.



oh and i also started a new job today. see? big day.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

he's got this



this morning as i was standing in front of the mirror flat ironing my hair, i was thinking.

i was thinking about the season of life we are in. i was thinking about the mountains set before us to climb.

i was thinking about the new job that i start either tomorrow or monday, about the permit i needed to go acquire this morning. about the conversation with my current boss that was ahead of me this afternoon.

i was thinking about the ants mike found crawling on my $5 box of honey nut cheerios that now had to be trashed. the box that was still 3/4 full. about the fact that we can't afford to be throwing away perfectly good, yummy food.

i was thinking about the zits that had appeared on my face all of a sudden. after a good 3 months of no breaking out. how frustrating it was. i was thinking about the stress that caused them. a level of stress i have not experienced in a long time.

i was thinking about the jobs mike has interviewed for that would be really good jobs. jobs that we are still waiting to hear on. i was thinking about the suspense of waiting.

i was thinking about the $68 i need to spend on contacts. about the last pair currently in my eyes that were feeling too old. the ones that need to be trashed soon but can't be until i find a way to get the new ones.

i was thinking about the conversation mike and i had had the night before. about how i needed to open up to him more when i was struggling. about how easily frustrated i had been lately.

i was thinking about the big party i'm planning that is only 2 weeks away with lots of diy still to do.

i was thinking about the shop and the business and how much i want to grow it. about how i'm going to find time to work full time and still grow this business while helping my family and spending time with my love. about how its all going to be a lot and how was i going to make it all work.

i was thinking about the future. about what it was going to look like. what was god's plan?!

and then it hit me.

he's testing us. maybe that's not the best term and maybe some people will get mad that i put it that way but thats the way it came into my head.

Source: via Ashley on Pinterest



he is putting these mountains in front of us to climb. to work through. to fall apart and grow stronger. yes there are a lot of things against us right now. but that doesn't mean we can't get through it.

i may be frustrated when i shouldn't be. i may say things i don't mean. i may be stressed when i need to just breathe. i may want to just pretend all is fine and dandy when it certainly is not.

but he is there. listening. watching. healing. strengthening. he's got this.

i just need to pick myself back up, brush myself off, and move forward. conquer the next little task on the way to climbing these mountains.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

back on the wagon

for the last 6 months, i have not allowed myself to think about weight watchers. i just kept telling myself i needed to find a method of losing this weight without turning back to my old faithful*.

so i just pushed it out of my mind and didn't allow it to be an option. like. at all.

and then i landed a job interview. and mike found me staring at my closet, touching interview-y type clothes that i knew wouldn't fit no matter how much sucking in i did. clothes that were falling off me a year ago. with this lost look on my face, down and depressed and disgusted with myself.

a little while later we were in the car going somewhere, probably to get food that wasn't going to help the situation. and he said it. "do you want to go back on weight watchers?" i immediately said no. that wasn't going to make anything different.

and then i proceeded to spend the next 24 hours thinking about nothing but weight watchers. how successful i had been on it not once but twice. losing 45 pounds in a year, maintaining for another three years, and then back on it to lose the last 15 pounds last summer (2011), putting me at my lowest weight since i was 10 and playing softball everyday.

i had been telling myself for the last 6 months that i didn't have to go on weight watchers to lose this pesky 30 pounds i gained. that there were other ways that didn't require a monthly fee. that i could do this on my own this time.

and i have now failed so many times in the last 3 months, its disgustingly embarrassing.

and then m put the thought in my head and i knew its what i had to do.

i was going to use a knock-off ww app that a blog friend told me about and i tried it for a few days but it was frustrating me so much, i wasn't motivated at all to use it.

so about 20 minutes before writing this post, i did it.

goodbye $56 for the first 3 months, hello plan that i know i can be successful on. a plan i know as well as i know my own street address.

i'm nervous. i won't lie.

i know i can do this but i'm having a very self-deprecating dialogue running in my head right now. and i'm so pissed at myself and can't seem to get over that.

but whatever. have to move forward.

weigh in day - wednesday
monthly update post - last thursday of the month


jumping back on the wagon and determined to get back to where i want to be, where i am most comfortable, where i can walk out the door feeling confident instead of ashamed, embarrassed, and less than happy.

although i am the last person who should be giving tips right given how far off the wagon i fell, i do have my arsenal of tricks from the past. so please let me know... i'd love to support you. truly.

and if you have an awesome low point snacks you want to throw my way, please do. i need new yummy stuff to get excited about.


*history: joined weight watchers in january 2007 attending meetings every saturday morning. followed the plan and stuck with the meetings before canceling my membership for money reasons in april 2008. i had lost just over 40 pounds. i maintained from mid 2008 thru mid 2011. while maintaining, i managed to lose another 8-10 pounds without trying. then in the summer of 2011, i decided i wanted to get rid of the last 10-15 pounds to be at "goal weight" and rejoined weight watchers doing the online version only (no meetings). i lost another 10 pounds to be at my lowest weight yet which is where i was when i left my ex-husband and moved back to southern california in november 2011. i had lost a total of 56.8 pounds.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Wordless Wednesday {and giveaway!}

Love this little family of mine...

More of these Labor Day pictures to come when I can sit down in front of my computer long enough to edit and post them :)

***

One of my bloggy BFFs, Aunie, is having a huge sponsor giveaway today and I'm giving away any camera strap from the shop to one lucky winner... go! enter! smile!

giveaway // shop

and if i could find some better light in my stupid little apartment (for photographing product), i will be listing 9 new straps in the next week so keep an eye out for those!

Friday, September 7, 2012

Just Because Friday

Not really sure how I let a week and a half go by without blogging... kinda unlike me but things have been busy so I guess life got in the way.

Anyway... I have this post in my drafts that I keep wanting to finish but I have so much I want to articulate that I am having trouble articulating it.. if that makes sense. Which it doesn't. Maybe that's why I've been avoiding blogger. That post is taunting me. :)

My brain has been a mess lately. So much to do, to accomplish, to worry about, to take care of.

Current job, finding a new job, throwing this awesome 30th birthday party in a month, building the business, taking care of a needy puppy, and continuing to make my relationship stronger and get over the hurdles.

My brain is a mess.

But a cute picture may help.


So much to blog about. Promise to be better about it next week :)
Just Because Friday

Have a good weekend, friends!

xoxo

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Summertime >>> Fair Time

A couple weeks ago, M and I were bored and decided to take advantage of the last days of the county fair. Neither of us were interested in the rides but there was a dog show that day and really, the fair is a fantabulous place to people watch, a favorite past time of ours. 



these people are crazy. i could never. 
have i mentioned i hate rollercoasters or anything stomach-dropping?
 For years, I have wanted to try one thing and never have...

Fried Oreos.
They were so good... so so good. 

we bought fedoras.
#57 - Take pictures in a photobooth. Check. [101 in 1001]



Oh hey, Handsome.

 #30 - Go to a county fair. Check. [101 in 1001]